#59: Be Careful Who You Compare Yourself To
Dave: This is a little, quick, short-
Speaker 2: What's up?
Dave: You said something to me the other day and I want you to repeat it.
Speaker 2: I don't remember. What'd I say?
Dave: We talk about health and fitness and diets a lot. We haven't talked about it as much on this podcast. We were talking about it.
Speaker 2: Mm-hmm (affirmative).
Dave: You've been doing this mix of plant- based and paleo and all this stuff. Anyway-
Speaker 2: I'm trying to get down to the 32.
Dave: 32 waist. Long story short is we were talking about food and I said to you, " Oh, man, whatever. I eat healthier than 90% of the people."
Speaker 2: Mm-hmm (affirmative). Mm-hmm (affirmative).
Dave: You looked at me and you're like, " That's exactly your problem." You said, " Who you comparing yourself to? You want to compare yourself to the average American where we know what those statistics are?"
Speaker 2: I don't.
Dave: I was like, " Damn, you're right." And then this has come up in every book, it's like-
Speaker 2: It's better than average.
Dave: Yeah. I want you to explain why you said that to me. I'm not going to explain it. You explain it.
Speaker 2: Yeah. As Dave said, he was bragging about being better than most people about what he ate.
Speaker 2: But like we talk, it's all about peer groups and role models, right?
Speaker 2: So, you got to be careful about who you compare yourself against, right? I think this is kind of insidious. This is something that kind of creeps into all of us, right? You don't even notice it. Even though we talk about peer groups and role models all the time and you've heard it here before, we still let it creep into our life, right, because we surround ourselves with people and amongst those people we might be looking pretty good. But you always have to be asking yourself, " Are those the people you want to compare yourself against?"
Dave: Mm-hmm (affirmative).
Speaker 2: And if not and you still surround yourself with them, if those are your boys and girls and friends and whatever, then you're going to have to work 10 times as hard to learn this lesson, right, because you're going to have to fight inertia. You're going to have to fight yourself from falling into a pattern of comparing yourself against your neighbors.
Speaker 2: Stop comparing yourself against your neighbors. Start comparing yourself... What Dave should be comparing against himself is pick the role models of the people that he is trying to emulate.
Dave: Mm- hmm( affirmative).
Speaker 2: Who are you trying to be? Who are you trying to get to? Now look at those, five of those people, and tell me how you're doing diet- wise versus them.
Dave: Yeah, because the same day you sent me this little graphic from James Altucher... He calls it the five by five rule. You're not just the average of the five people around you, you're the average of five habits you do, the five foods you eat, the five ideas you have, the content you consume. But relating back to-
Speaker 2: Mm-hmm (affirmative). It's funny. That was the same day. That was later in the day.
Dave: Well, that always happens that way.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Dave: But your other point is... All right, we were talking about marketing, right? That's my job.
Speaker 2: Mm- hmm( affirmative).
Dave: What good does it do me to say, " I am better than X% of this group," right?
Speaker 2: Who cares?
Dave: You would say, " Cool. Pick the top 1%, model your day after those people."
Speaker 2: Yeah, you better. Mm- hmm(affirmative). Yeah, and see, and rank yourself against them and then you'll see, " All right. Here are all the shortcomings that I have and what I need to do in order to inaudible them." You can't make those things actionable. You can't understand how to get to the next level unless you're modeling yourself against that level.
Dave: Totally. So, whatever. If you're playing golf with your friends and you got three of them that are all terrible and you're the best one, change your group.
Speaker 2: Yean, it's exactly that. Yeah, and so if you wanted to be the next... I don't even know golfers, the next big golfer... I only remember Tiger. But if you're the next big golfer, if that was your goal, to become a professional golfer, you wouldn't be looking at the five friends that you have that can't play golf and say, " Well, I'm doing pretty good next to them."
Speaker 2: You'd compare yourself against the top pros out there and figure out, " How do I get there?"
Dave: So, I wanted to put this lesson down on audio in seeking wisdom because it's such an important one.
Speaker 2: Remember, it's insidious. It creeps in, you got to fight it every day.
Dave: So, think about the company that you keep when you're setting goals or just every day, think about who you're comparing yourself to. And the hard part is, people don't want to do it-
Speaker 2: They don't.
Dave: ...because if you raise the bar and you compare yourselves to people that are way ahead of you, you're going to feel like, " Shit. I can't keep up. I'm not making as much progress." You don't get those same little pat on the backs as you-
Speaker 2: Sure, so they make excuses. " Oh, Dave was lucky. Oh, his dad is whoever. Oh, whatever." That's when you let that creep into your thinking, that kind of negative thinking, and negative thinking is never going to move you forward, right?
Dave: Mm-hmm (affirmative).
Speaker 2: And so always be thinking... And again, if you surround yourself with people who are not your role models, you're going to have to work 10X as hard on this lesson.
Dave: The other thing is it's not even just when you... And when you do surround yourself with the role models, because you're around the right people, you always happen to be luckier.
Speaker 2: Mm- hmm( affirmative).
Dave: You ever notice that?
Speaker 2: It's funny how that happens.
Dave: You fall into the right opportunities.
Speaker 2: Yeah, funny, because you're starting to model yourself against their behaviors and what made them successful.
Dave: All right. So, keep an eye on the company that you keep.
Speaker 2: Five stars only.
Dave: Speaking of the company that you keep...
Speaker 2: See the company that I keep?
Speaker 2: I keep only five star only level of company.
Dave: 212, maybe?
Speaker 2: Something like that.
Speaker 2: We're trying to get to 300. As Dave reminded me today, go to Amazon. Search for Hypergrowth, one word. You'll see five stars are already on that book we just put up last week on Amazon.
Speaker 2: Download, get yourself a copy.
Dave: That book is 3. 99. Three.
Speaker 2: 3. 99.
Speaker 2: Give it to some friends, send it to some of your coworkers, and then tell them, " Listen up, five stars only. Don't do the uncle like that. Five stars only."
Dave: All right, we got to go. D. C. speaking at the Revenue Summit tomorrow. I'm going to post this podcast today.
Speaker 2: Where's that?
Dave: San Francisco. I've heard it's one of the sneaky sales and marketing events of the year.
Speaker 2: All right. I'm going to be speaking.
Dave: 9: 15 AM.
Speaker 2: I'm kicking it off tomorrow. Let's go.
Dave: Talk about why your sales and marketing funnel is broken.
Speaker 2: We'll put a link on for that.
Speaker 2: inaudible. Peace.